fold of limbs
skin doesn't cover much
of your corners
elbows knees chin
little left of your bones
deteriorating songs
your throat closed
you forget I am stronger
than that
(I almost forget)
and you cry on the floor
knowing I listen
head tucked, you
weep
and I want to weep too
but that time is over
the sun warms my upturned
face
you hide face down
8 comments:
such a strong, sublimely written
poem, holly, equisite actually.
Another very good piece, Holly. Reading it, I could see it so clearly. PS I loved your interpretation of my poem. You might want to know that I struck the first couple of verses that were more explicit to leave it open to interpretation *grin*.
I'm thinking of a person tucked up in the fetal position, as in yoga, and maybe the same person lying supine, older, but remembering pain. A tender poem, with a lovely flow to the words.
Jo, I'm glad you liked my interpretation. I'm glad you left your poem a little "open" too.
Cynthia, coming from you those words mean a lot. I am flattered.
Christine, I'm really glad you liked the poem. Yes, "remembering pain"...yes. Thank you so much.
Yes, this is a very strong and beautiful poem, Holly. What a powerhouse of an ending!! I love how you start with the fold of limbs and bring it back to the folding of the person face down. Also some fabulous music! Of course, "throat closed" is beautiful.
I interpret this poem in two ways. Maybe one person is being "reborn," in a sense. The narrator seems to be saying goodbye almost to the weaker self, the self that is curled up face down on the floor. Of course, the other interpretation could be that two people are involved in the poem. I love that open interpretation. WONDERFUL!!
Then I read your post above, and it gave me much more food for thought. Beautiful work, Holly!
neato Julie...all the things I was feeling really came out
Thank you for reading. I am always flattered you even like my work...I'm not worthy!
i agree with what Julie said--I read it as one person but no matter what the interp--it is good
Wonderful structure with the contrast of face up and face down. There's a great mix of strength and tenderness here.
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